• Bosses have to be careful when verbalizing their thoughts. They may think they are just offering suggestions, but their employees may believe he or she was giving an order.
• Successful bosses need to be careful when being asked to talk about their success; they can sound egotistical quickly. They must remember to turn these discussions toward the person asking; he or she wants to share too.
• Common bad habits by bosses
o Overestimate their contribution to a project
o Take credit, partial or complete, for successes that truly belongs to others
o Have an elevated opinion of their professional skills and standing among their peers
o Conveniently ignore cost failures and time-consuming dead ends they’ve created
o Exaggerate their project’s impact on net profits or other successes
• Bad habits can be cured by
o Pointing them out and apologizing for them
o Showing the havoc the habit causes others and stating a willingness to change
o Demonstrating a slight behavior tweak that can achieve a much more appealing effect
o Following up monthly or regularly (for the next 18 months) to see how you are doing
• Four key beliefs help bosses become successful:
o They’ve succeeded
o They can succeed
o They will succeed
o They choose to succeed
Their logic string is I am successful. I behave this way. Therefore I must be successful because I behave this way.
Successful people being there are doing what they choose to do because they are doing it.
• “When we do what we choose to do, we are committed. When we do with we have to do, we are compliant.”
Cognitive dissonance is the disconnection between what we believe in our mind and what we experience or see in reality.
Take a look around you at work. Why are you there? What keeps you coming back day after day? Is it any of the big four – money, power, status, or popularity? Or is it something deeper that has developed over time? If you know what matters to you, it is easier for you to commit to change. If you can’t identify what matters to you, you won’t know when it is being threatened. People only change when something they value is being challenged.
Reference: Goldsmith, M (2007) WHAT GOT YOU HERE WON’T GET YOU THERE: How Successful People Become Even More Successful! New York: Hyperion Publications