Just as I was transparent about the 40-day body journey, so I will be about this 40-day Defending Your Heart journey. In my life, as in the lives of many folks I’ve talked with and read about, love equals pain. It equals loss. It equals betrayal. It equals despair. Yet it is something we continue to be pulled toward.
Once, someone described my heart as having a hole in the bottom of it, two large gashes across it, and being encased in barbed wire. I felt this visualization defined my heart well. I knew exactly what caused each gash, and what caused the hole in the bottom, and why, because of this pain, I encased my heart with virtual barbed wire to keep it from further pain. I remember well the moment when I stated to myself, “no more, I cannot take anymore.” Our discussion about my heart then turned to the fact that it is hard to heal a heart with a hole in the bottom. I was asked to write a letter to the person whose loss had caused the hole in my heart and then to write a response from that person.
At first, the assignment sounded strange but I tried it. Once I got through writing about the pain, I was able to write about the love and the good times with that person before the loss. Just as a rainbow comes from the storm, I was able to smile through the tears. I was able to forgive and to ask for forgiveness.
If you have a hole in your heart, perhaps this writing assignment will help you too. Give it a try.