Posted in Blog, Self Improvement

Coaching My Way to a Softer Life

soft

I’m a boss, a supervisor, and a servant leader. I’ve been a mentor several times. Now, I’m learning to be a coach. Here’s what I’m learning:

Coaching is confidential, of course, but it is also more passive than mentoring. As a boss, you act like a consultant. You know the best way to get where you want to go, and you work toward getting your team there. As a mentor, you use your experiences to help your mentees obtain their goals. As a coach, your client decides where to go and how to get there.

As a coach you ask your client, what do you want to talk about? What can you do? And you ask for permission to give suggestions to the client. After multiple years being a mentor and a boss, the last one is hard for me to remember.

To be a good coach, you

  • Stand next to your client and watch them as they choose the path they want to take and how to get there. Your clients are the experts of his/her own life.
  • Keep your opinions to yourself. Your client shouldn’t be able to know how you feel or what you believe about whatever you are discussing.
  • Empower your client’s journey which is always powerful.
  • Practice increasing your tolerance for
    • challenges
    • ambiguity
    • others’ anxiety
    • others’ disapproval
    • others’ stress
  • Practice international equilibrium which is a fancy way of saying staying balanced within yourself while being pulled by fear, conflict, and anxiety.

So, why am I am taking coaching? Well, I always want to be learning new things. I always want to be improving. And I think being a good coach will also help me be a better boss. What do you think? Do any of these tips speak to you today?