Posted in Blog, Self Improvement

Coaching My Way to a Softer Life

soft

I’m a boss, a supervisor, and a servant leader. I’ve been a mentor several times. Now, I’m learning to be a coach. Here’s what I’m learning:

Coaching is confidential, of course, but it is also more passive than mentoring. As a boss, you act like a consultant. You know the best way to get where you want to go, and you work toward getting your team there. As a mentor, you use your experiences to help your mentees obtain their goals. As a coach, your client decides where to go and how to get there.

As a coach you ask your client, what do you want to talk about? What can you do? And you ask for permission to give suggestions to the client. After multiple years being a mentor and a boss, the last one is hard for me to remember.

To be a good coach, you

  • Stand next to your client and watch them as they choose the path they want to take and how to get there. Your clients are the experts of his/her own life.
  • Keep your opinions to yourself. Your client shouldn’t be able to know how you feel or what you believe about whatever you are discussing.
  • Empower your client’s journey which is always powerful.
  • Practice increasing your tolerance for
    • challenges
    • ambiguity
    • others’ anxiety
    • others’ disapproval
    • others’ stress
  • Practice international equilibrium which is a fancy way of saying staying balanced within yourself while being pulled by fear, conflict, and anxiety.

So, why am I am taking coaching? Well, I always want to be learning new things. I always want to be improving. And I think being a good coach will also help me be a better boss. What do you think? Do any of these tips speak to you today?

 

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Author:

Dr. Sheila Embry is a govie, author, pracademician, sister, aunt, cousin, and friend who loves to read, write, think, and laugh. Many of her blog postings are summaries or excerpts of books that she read and wants to share to encourage others. An author with more than 25 years experience within the legislative and executive branches of the U. S. federal government holding 3 accredited degrees: Doctor of Management in Organizational Leadership, Master of Arts in Human Resources Development, and Baccalaureate of Business Administration, she believes in continuing learning both on and off the job. She has been recognized with multiple professional and writing awards for her peer-reviewed, publications. Click the bibliography page above for a listing of all the publications.

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